There may be someone you truly want to forgive.

You may have told yourself many times:

It’s over.
I want to move on.
I don’t want to carry this anymore.

Maybe years have passed. The person may no longer be in your life. What happened is already over.

And yet, the moment you remember it, the anger, sadness, or resentment comes back.

You want to forgive.
You want to be free.

But somehow, you can’t.

Why?

The Event Is Over, But I Am Still Living in the Story

Our body works almost like a camera.

Through our eyes, ears, nose, and body, we take in everything we experience. But we don’t simply record what happened exactly as it was.

We take pictures from our own point of view.

What they did to me.
What they said to me.
How they made me feel.
What should have happened.
What I wish I had said.

All of these pictures remain in our minds.

From those pictures, we create a story.

They betrayed me.
They didn’t appreciate me.
They hurt me.
I didn’t deserve this.

The actual event may have happened only once.

But inside our minds, we can live in that story for years.

Why Can’t I Just Forgive?

We tell ourselves:

I should forgive.

I want to let it go.

I just want to be free.

But we are trying to forgive while still living inside the pictures of what happened.

When I think of that person, I see the picture I have stored of them.

When I remember what happened, I experience my story again.

The person may not even be in my life anymore, but inside my mind, the story continues.

This is why simply deciding to forgive is not enough.

We cannot become free from a story while we are still living inside it.

Understanding Is Not the Same as Letting Go

We may understand why someone behaved the way they did.

We may tell ourselves that the past is over.

We may think positively.

We may sincerely want to forgive.

But if the pictures, anger, resentment, judgment, and hurt remain in our minds, the past remains with us.

Understanding the story does not free us from it. Trying to forgive does not erase it.

We become free only when we discard the mind that is holding it.

Forgiveness Becomes Possible When We Let Go

Through meditation, we can step outside the story and look back at the mind we have been carrying.

Instead of asking only,

“How can I forgive this person?”

we can ask,

“What am I still holding in my mind?”

The anger.

The resentment.

The judgment.

The words I keep replaying.

The picture of that person.

The picture of what happened.

And even the picture of myself as the person who was hurt.

When we see these minds clearly, we can discard them.

We don’t need to change the past.

We don’t need to rewrite the story.

We need to let go of the mind that is still living in it.

Only When We Discard the Mind Can We Truly Be Free

Forgiveness does not mean that what happened was right.

It does not mean returning to an unhealthy relationship or giving up necessary boundaries.

It means that what happened no longer has to continue living inside me.

When we discard the pictures and the story from our minds, forgiveness no longer has to be forced.

There is nothing left to replay.

Nothing left to fight with.

Nothing left to hold against someone.

Only when we let go of that mind can we truly forgive and become free.

The Peace Is Already Within Us

Within us is already a true mind that is peaceful, clear, grateful, and free.

But when we live inside the stories and pictures we have accumulated, it is difficult to experience that mind.

At Long Island Meditation, we practice a systematic meditation method to reflect on the mind we have accumulated and discard it.

We do not have to spend the rest of our lives trying to make peace with painful stories.

We can let them go.

The past has already ended.

But if its pictures remain in my mind, I continue to live there.

We cannot think our way out of the past. We cannot force ourselves to forgive. We can become free when we let go of the mind that still holds it.

When the mind is gone, the story is gone.

And when the story is gone, we are free.

Ready to Let Go of What You’ve Been Carrying?

Learn how to reflect on the mind you have accumulated, let go of the past, and return to the peaceful mind already within you.